Find A Way
by ohxasphyxiationx
Summary: He wondered if he would keep his promise. "I'll be waiting." Just a little diddy I came up with. --AkuRoku, Songfic, M to be safe.


**A little something I thought up listening to my iPod Shuffle. I don't know, I felt like writing some AkuRoku. And for some reason, I couldn't stop thinking of when Axel faded. At the end of the game, was Roxas even aware of the fact that Axel was gone? Well, I'm not sure; this was just a question for you to answer. But I got all sentimental about Axel… So uh, this is what happens when I get sad about him. Yep.**

**Just because it got kind of confusing, **_**bold italics are song lyrics, **_regular text is the narrative of the story, _italics are Axel's thoughts/memories or just for emphasis._ Okie dokes.

**Disclaimer: I do not own any of the characters mentioned in this story. They belong to Square Enix and all of their respectful owners. The song used in this story, **_**Find A Way, **_**belongs to **_**The Used**_** and all other respectful owners. This is a work of fiction. I make no profit from the publication of this story on this domain. **

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_**Lay your head down, just for now.**_

Axel wasn't quite sure how long he'd been lying there. All he knew was that he was tired, and it felt good to just lie and be still, even if for one moment. He knew that he wouldn't get up, wouldn't bounce back and stand on his own two feet again. He was just too _tired._

"Axel!" He heard a voice call out his name, but his vision was too clouded to see who it belonged to. His thoughts were hazy. Only one thing he knew for certain- that voice sounded just like _his._

_Roxas._

_**Space fills your mind and you dream a while.**___

Axel could feel himself slipping away, slowly. His thoughts wandered. He tried to concentrate on the moment he was in, try to bring himself back, but he knew it was of no use. He couldn't help but let his mind drift off. Drift back to the only thing that ever occupied his mind.

_Where is Roxas now?_

Axel knew he didn't have a heart, knew that he couldn't really feel these things, but he felt a sharp cold encase his body, envelope him in a deathly embrace, and it was something he could only describe as… _sadness? _Axel wasn't quite sure how he was able to describe the feeling, but he knew he'd felt it before.

He'd been feeling it all along. Ever since Roxas left.

_**Sun floods your room as you drown.**_

Axel was surprised once he focused back on the present. For someone whose life was so full of darkness, everything was now so bright and clear. He looked up, surprised to see Sora kneeling above him, his expression full of concern.

That face… just a few slight differences, but he saw Roxas there and it made him smile.

"You're… fading away…" Sora's voice was solemn, full of sadness, and Axel felt warmth in that empty space where his heart should have been. He felt cared for. It was small, hardly distinct, but it was _there_, and that was all that really mattered.

"Well, that's what happens when you put your whole being into an attack. Not that Nobodies actually _have_ beings... right?" Axel chuckled darkly.

He had put all he had into finding Roxas… all of it, for nothing.

But he had seen him, been near him, and it was enough to give him the strength to keep trying for as long as he could.

_**Your lungs full of breathing, your true love, believe…**___

Perhaps it wasn't in vain. He had meant what he said. Roxas had left and he had missed him dearly. He had tried his best, it just… wasn't good enough.

He wished Roxas was here to comfort him, to make this not seem so dismal. He hated to admit it, but he was scared. He just needed to hear Roxas' voice, see him, one more time. Hear those words… make sure that Roxas still felt the same.

He didn't know where Roxas was, but he could still feel it. Their love was so real, so _true_, that the doubts slipped away. It was special, nothing could change that.

He still wished he had the chance to say goodbye.

_**One more time to say, I love you always.  
And keeping faith, letting love find a way.**_

Axel could still remember vividly their last time together on the clock tower.

"_Bought us some ice cream," Axel said, extending one Sea-Salt ice cream to Roxas, who eagerly took it. They both sat in silence for a while, staring at the sun as it set over Twilight Town, bathing them in an orange glow._

_Roxas looked up at Axel, smiling._

"_You haven't touched your ice cream yet."_

_Axel hadn't really bought the ice cream with the intentions of eating it. As a matter of fact, he wasn't sure why he had bought two in the first place. Instead, he just smiled and took a huge bite out of it._

_Axel couldn't help it when his face scrunched up slightly._

"_Jeez, this really IS salty," Axel exclaimed rather loudly._

_Roxas just laughed. When it was quiet again, he stood up, turning to Axel._

"_So… I have to go back. The others are waiting." When Roxas received a puzzled look from Axel, he elaborated. "Hayner, Pence, Olette."_

_Axel couldn't bring himself to look at Roxas._

"_You should go find them, looking for your answer."_

_Roxas looked back and smiled at him. It was breathtaking._

"_See you, Axel." _

_Axel smiled back, his attempt at hiding his sadness not very convincing._

"_See you, partner."_

_When Roxas was gone, Axel was surprised to find a stray tear rolling down his cheek. He brought his hand up to touch it. Unlike the rest of him, it was unusually warm._

And it was then that Axel was sure of it. Roxas was different.

Roxas made him _feel._

_**Move; let the stars suck you in.**___

Axel felt himself fading further and further away. Axel wasn't sure what would happen to him now. Wasn't sure where he would go.

"Axel, what were you trying to do?" Sora spoke again, breaking Axel out of his dreamlike trance.__

_**Hold tight the night's air and breathe again.**___

Axel's senses became heightened, more aware, and what was a moment ago bright and clear now appeared dark and dismal. He took a deep breath so he could answer Sora. So that someone, _anyone, _would know why he had done what he had.

"I wanted to see Roxas. He… was the only one I liked…" Axel was straining to use his voice, to form these words, and knew he was growing more tired by the second. "He made me feel…like I had a heart."

But now, in this moment, Axel only felt comforting numbness.__

_**Let go and be burnt by the moon.**___

Axel felt himself slipping away, felt himself disappearing. He felt light, felt as though he were floating, and a sense of peacefulness washed over him.

He had spent so long fighting, gone so far to find him… And now, he just needed to rest.

Just for a bit.__

_**Your hands full of feeling, your true love, believe…**___

Axel was granted with another memory, this one more thrilling and beautiful than the last. He remembered everything.

_The feel of Roxas' soft skin under his fingers. The smell of Roxas' silky blonde hair. The sound of Roxas' peaceful breathing as he slept, his arms wrapped around Axel's thin waist. The night had been so full of love, tenderness, passion, and pleasure, but it was now, in the afterglow of bliss, that Axel felt the most._

_He felt the love transferring between Roxas and himself, felt it traveling through the air, and he couldn't help but say it, just to hear what it sounded like, to experience what the words felt like in his mouth, sounded like in his voice:_

"_I love you, Roxas."_

Axel now found it a shame that Roxas had never heard how right the words had sounded.

_**One more time to say, I love you always.  
And keeping faith, letting love find a way.**___

He wished he could have told Roxas one more time, wish he had the chance, but Axel supposed it wasn't meant to be.

He closed his eyes.__

_**One more time to say, I love you always.  
And keeping faith, letting love find a way.**_

He wished he could have heard Roxas say those words to him, just once, but Axel didn't need to hear it. He had felt it, in every way that Roxas had touched his life.

He smiled peacefully.

_**I love you to death.  
Could you love me to death?  
I love you to death.  
Could you love me? Could you love me?**_

He had followed Roxas' until the end. He had kept him promise to himself. It didn't matter to Axel that the end was drawing near. He had never felt closer to Roxas in his life.

He didn't know if he would ever see Roxas again, didn't even know if Roxas would miss him, but for once in his miserable life Axel had done something honorable, had been loyal to both himself and Roxas. It was a fit ending for him.

_**One more time to say, I love you always.  
And keeping faith, letting love find a way.**___

As he let the very last of him fade away, he couldn't help but wonder if Roxas would keep his promise, as he had kept his:

"_I'll be waiting."_

It was then that Axel faded, hoping it was true.__

_**I will love you death, letting love find a way.**_


End file.
